In The World
Gandhi said “Be the change you want to see in the world”.
I’ve found myself quoting this a few times in the last week, not in reference to my personal life, but committee stuff, politics, human nature, sociological drama (all the same thing, really).
I’m struggling in my personal life at the moment. I feel bogged down. I feel overwhelmed with everything I have to do just to stay afloat. I feel lonely. I feel like the weight of my daughter’s world rests solely on my shoulders. I know these feelings are in my head, I know that I’m not alone, I know that we will be fine; the world will not cave in on itself just because she spent the morning cutting holes in the tv box and using the ballet bun hair nets I just bought as bags.
It occurred to me this morning that part of the problem may just be that I am not applying ‘be the change’ to my personal life. I am wrapping myself in the familiar routines because they don’t require any thought or effort, but they are having the same effect that they have always had (see above). I am not living the life that I have chosen to live; I’m letting my life run on automatic, because it’s easier. With everything else I’ve had to deal with over the last however many months, it’s just easier.
But it’s easier in the way that just picking up after a child instead of teaching them how to pick up after themselves is easier. There is less hassle, no arguing, and the job gets done, but in the long term you are the one who is always going to have to do it. Short term easy, long term hard.
So, since I am actively advocating changing the status quo in other areas of my life, it’s time to start making things short term hard, long term easy. Buckle up, it’s going to be a bumpy ride, but I hear the destination is great.